Chiswick
20 Overs
Retire at 25
Dodgers won by 90 (ninety) runs
Dodgers went into this game somewhat apprehensively, many good things having been said about our opponents (mainly by our opponents), and emerged having given them a right good stuffing. There were many incidents and potential records, so read on...
At 5.10pm (yes, 5.10pm) Cap'n Priest won the toss and elected to bat, possibly with a view to limiting the damage, and early progress was painfully slow. The self-styled "Yorkshire Slogger" was very much in evidence - not! - as only 26 runs came in the first eight overs for the loss of Chris Jacobs, despite some good aggressive running.
The follow-up bowlers were not of the same standard, however, and Priest began to break the shackles with a couple of bold shots, including a sumptuous cover drive. Retiring at 25, John Hilary entered the fray sporting his new helmet. He quickly racked up 17 including pulled fours from consecutive balls before holing out. Phil McBarron eventually reached the retirement figure bringing together Neil Benn and Guy van der Westhead, both of whom reached 25 in brisk fashion. Guy ran particularly well in this partnership, although was somewhat quicker downhill than uphill. Tawhid sadly managed only a golden duck.
Dodgers' 141 looked very decent, although the outfield was again ultra fast and Treasury had told us how good their batting was. Oh dear lads, let's hope you can show better judgement in running the country's finances. After seven overs, their innings was in tatters at a sensational 10 for 5, thanks to left arm pacemen Benn and Cooper. John's wickets had all come courtesy of catches from Tawhid Qureshi, the last one of which was a beauty running away to his left.
Though Treasury recovered slightly, any hope of a sustained rally was soon snuffed out as John Hilary, Tawhid and David Pope all grabbed wickets to add to their misery. David sensibly kept his infamous Doobler largely concealed for the future, and Tawhid's wicket came from a low caught-and-bowled giving him four catches in the game and man-of-the-match. The only blemishes came from poor drops by Benn off Hilary and Pope off himself.
So, a right tonking dished out with potential records galore: earliest evening start time; earliest evening finish time; highest number of retirements; most catches in an innings; most games in a season; most wins in a season. To add to that, Tawhid became the fourteenth man-of-the-match this year.
And so to the Phil McBarron section of this report. Phil gets a lot of stick, but he was on prime form last night. Let's start with betting, a deplorable activity I would have nothing to do with myself. Treasury had been made clear favourites at 4/9, but even these cramped odds were attractive enough for YS as he risked a "substantial sum".
The Dodgers committee were reported to be suffering from "shock and awe" at his actions, and have asked Lord Justice Hutton to conduct an inquiry when he's free. I understand that two questions will be posed: did McBarron deliberately bat slowly in order to lose and how can anyone be daft enough to take 4/9 on that load of donkeys?
On the first question, McB would appear to be guilty - he only scored a handful of singles in the first eight overs and many shots never left the strip, never mind the square. He is set, however, to ask for 127 similar offences to be taken into account and may therefore escape censure on a technique-ality.
Phil returned to the Dodgers dressing room to make a stunning announcement - "that is the last time I open for Dodgers in a 20 over match - I want to be an all-rounder". About an hour later, when the cheering had subsided, clarification was sought. In one of the most blatant examples of "sexing down" yet seen, McB first retreated to "unless John Carr asks me to" then "I may not be the best person to open in 20 over games". Watch this space for further developments...
Neil Benn
Dodgers Innings
McBarron retired 26
Jacobs b Owen 5
Priest (c) retired 26
Hilary J c Horwill 17
Westhead retired 26
Benn retired 25
Qureshi c Evans 0
Cooper not out 3
Matthews (w) not out 1
Extras (b6, lb3, w2, nb2) 12
Total (20 overs) 141 for 3
dnb: Pope
Bowling
O M R W
Maramoto 4 0 10 0
Owen 4 1 12 1
Horwill 4 0 35 1
Krishnan 2 0 22 0
Elsey 2 0 19 0
Evans 2 0 21 1
Hogarth 2 0 19 0
Treasury & Cabinet Office Innings
Horwill c Qureshi b Cooper 1
McGrath c Qureshi b Cooper 3
Evans not out 29
Maramoto c Qureshi b Cooper 1
Elsey c&b Benn 1
Burton b Benn 0
Murphy b Hilary 0
Long b Hilary 1
Krishnan c Hilary b Pope 6
Owen c&b Qureshi 5
Extras (w4 nb1) 5
Total (16.2 overs) 51 all out
Wickets 1-1, 2-4, 3-9, 4-10, 5-10, 6-22, 7-37
Bowling
O M R W
Benn 4 1 8 2
Cooper 4 1 14 3
Qureshi 2.2 0 5 1
Hilary 4 0 14 2
Pope 2 0 9 1
Labels: hmt, reports2003
